I was texting with my friend Bobbi last night about my pregnancy (she is due shortly after me with her 2nd) and she said, "It seems to be the slowest, fastest time ever." The quote was fitting. For the longest time it felt like pregnancy lasted forever, and we had plenty of time to get it together before le bebe arrives. Now, we literally have three days till he is here and it feels nothing short of surreal. Where did the time go? How is it possible we only have a few days left?
God willing I will get to enjoy a minimum of one more pregnancy after this. But regardless of the future, I can say with all honesty that this has been an amazing pregnancy. I have enjoyed every minute. Despite many negative events transpiring while I was pregnant that got me upset, my pregnancy itself has been nothing short of miraculous. I honestly didn't know if I'd ever be able to have a baby, so this easy pregnancy has been such a praised blessing.
People keep asking me if I am excited. I feel guilty for this, but I feel kind of strange about the entire thing. On the one hand, I do have some first-timer nerves. On the other, I like having him to myself inside my belly. Perhaps since his birth is so organized and because there is no element of true surprise (for which I am thankful!), I feel more like I am in the eye of the storm; we don't know what lies ahead but we do know it will be difficult and very cool. I am terribly excited to meet him and I know the joy to come is beyond my current comprehension. It could be that I am in denial, I'm not sure. I think people expect me to be either ecstatic or a complete wreck with nerves. I am ecstatic but because this has been such a terrific pregnancy I am in no rush to get it over with. Does that make any sense?
And vaguely along those lines, my dad asked me last night if I am scared. I replied, 'No.' I mean, on some level I guess I have some sense of terror (LOL) but really I am feeling calm. My dad bestowed upon me one of the best compliments Ive ever been given. He said, "That's my girl! I always thought you would've made an excellent settler. You know how to keep your wits about you." Now, I don't know if that last part is true but the people who have settled land have always fascinated me and I am thrilled by the comparison!